Mormon Family Struggles with Mental Health – Lance & Brandee Heppler | Ep. 1746-1747

1746: Mormon Family Struggles with Mental Health – Lance & Brandee Heppler Pt 1.


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Join Lance and Brandee Heppler as they share their personal journeys in Mormonism and delve into mental health challenges they faced as they tried to be good Mormon parents. In this episode, Lance talks about his orthodox upbringing in Oregon, serving his mission in South Carolina, and his panic of finding someone to marry before graduating from BYU. Meanwhile, Brandee shares her struggle of not fitting in at church due in part to her parents being converts and her undiagnosed ADHD, making her wonder why it seemed God made her too “rowdy” as a woman instead of more subdued and “proper”.

Together they navigate the traditional gender roles expected of them as a married couple in the church while raising young children and serving in various callings. As they grapple with issues such as feminism and LGBTQ issues in the church, they also confront their own mental health struggles and the lack of support from the Mormon community. They share powerful insights about the often transactional nature of Mormon relationships and the harmful effects that come from some teachings that associate mental health struggles with sin. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking a deeper understanding of the challenges faced by those raised in Mormonism and the impact it can have on mental health.


1747: When Your Mormon Children Fall Away – Lance & Brandee Heppler Pt. 2


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Lance and Brandee Heppler began to question and ultimately leave the Mormon Church after their son Lake experienced mismanagement and mistreatment during his missionary training and service. This experience, along with their daughter Darby coming out as gay and being rejected by the Church, led them to start questioning Church teachings and practices. They also began to educate themselves about Church history and controversies through sources like the “Mormons & Masons” documentary, “Mormon Stories,” and the CES Letter.

Further cracks in their faith emerged when Brandee became aware of a child abuse incident at their local stake center that had been covered up by Church leaders. Despite these concerns, the Hepplers continued to attend Church and pretend to believe for a time. However, they eventually reached a breaking point and decided to leave the Church altogether. They found that prioritizing their family and their own happiness outside of the Church was more important than following Church rules and teachings that were not serving them.


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5 Responses

  1. WTF with this masturbation BS in the church. The amount of shame the church brings on to people for normal human behavior makes me sick. I have so many family members, including my Dad, still TBMs & I just don’t get it. The church destroys lives & families over a bunch of lies that Joseph Smith concocted. The more stories I hear the more angry I become at the church. Thank you so much for this platform you provide & for bringing on such amazing, strong, & brave people to share their stories.

  2. I really like these people a lot. Two good episodes. Their shelves were very very big to hold all those things for that amount of time…but, better late than never. Good luck to them and their family.

  3. Great episodes! I loved how open and truthful both guests were, and I especially appreciated Margi’s empathetic questions and how she framed Brandee’s experiences in the larger Mormon context. As a young mother, I had severe anxiety problems, so I understand the feeling of being a failure at the most important job that I had ever undertaken. For a long time I felt guilty that both of my children had inherited my anxiety “gene,” but I eventually realized that every parent passes on both desirable an undesirable traits to their offspring. I loved my children with my whole, imperfect heart, and I think that’s all that can be asked of any parent.

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