1856: My Mormon Mission Broke Me – Tara Herbert Pt. 1
Tara Herbert, born in Lake Charles, Louisiana, and adopted at age two by white Mormon parents from Utah, recounts her complex upbringing in a predominantly white and Mormon environment. Raised with four biological siblings, she navigates her identity as a black girl in Utah, where she initially struggles to recognize her racial difference. Despite feeling out of place, she engages with Mormonism deeply, experiencing conflicting emotions about her faith and cultural identity. Tara’s journey evolves through high school, where she grapples with societal perceptions of blackness, sexuality, and Mormon teachings on race and gender roles. Her mission to Atlanta, Georgia, exposes her to systemic racism within the Mormon Church and the broader community, challenging her beliefs and sense of self. Despite enduring trauma and grappling with guilt and shame, Tara finds solace in her eventual marriage and motherhood, yet continues to confront the complexities of her Mormon upbringing and racial identity.
1857: Overcoming Depression as a Mormon Mom – Tara Herbert Pt 2
Tara Herbert recounts her challenging journey within Mormonism and motherhood, reflecting on the societal pressures and personal struggles she faced. Despite feeling unprepared, she experienced the birth of her first child within the confines of Mormon teachings, grappling with the disconnection she felt towards motherhood and the expectations placed upon women. Tara delves into the erasure of women’s roles within Mormon theology, feeling disrespected and marginalized. She confronts the sexist doctrines and rituals of the faith, ultimately realizing the toxicity of the environment and its limitations on her identity and well-being. Through personal and familial trials, including PTSD and infertility, Tara navigates her disillusionment with Mormonism, finding solace in stepping away from its constraints and embracing a more liberated perspective on life and motherhood. Despite fluctuating emotions towards her past experiences, Tara prioritizes her mental health and autonomy, recognizing the importance of complexity and personal growth over the pursuit of a simplistic notion of happiness propagated by her former faith.
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Show Notes:
- LDS Genesis Group in Utah
- Mean Girls IMDB
- For the Strength of Youth
- John Bytheway
- Mormon Doctrine by Bruce R. McConkie
- The Truman Show IMDB
- Elder Holland talk about going through Gethsemane
- Broadway Book of Mormon Musical
- Polycystic ovarian syndrome
- Not So Molly Mormon podcast
- Year of Polygamy Podcast
- D&C 132
- The Making of Biblical Womanhood by Beth Allison Barr
Mormon Stories Related
- 1727: Bad Mormon, A Memoir – Heather Gay
- 1828-1830: Mormon Preppers Step Away – Kim and Josh Coffin
- 535-539: Tom Phillips, the Second Anointing, and Mormon Apostle Jeffrey R. Holland
- 1731: Exposing BYU’s Racism Goes VIRAL – Black Menaces’ Nathan Byrd
- 1782: Being Black at a White Christian University: Exposing Racism at BYU – Rachel Weaver
6 Responses
Hey Mormon Stories Team,
I think the Audio download and the video (with audio) are mismatched – different mormon stories. Just wanted to let you know! You have teamed up ‘Mormon Teen Industry’ with Tara Herbert’s mormon story.
Fixed! Thanks Belinda!
I realize that Mormon Stories allows its guests to express their opinions, so this is more directed at your guest, Tara.
I’m sorry for all the pain you’ve experienced. And I’m sorry for the things that have brought you to your current views on the role of men. I’m sure I would feel the same way, had I lived your experiences.
However. A man’s contribution to the creation of healthy, functioning, human progeny is far more than a penis and a few sperm cells.
I will never minimize the sacred and powerful role of women in creating babies and nurturing them, but I see a lot of men raising and nurturing happy, healthy humans, as full equals with their partners.
Creation of a human does not stop at birth.
Loved this episode so much. Thanks, Tara.
I tuned into this podcast while driving thinking that I was going to listen to how this young woman lost her faith on her mission. Sadly, it didn’t take long for John’s fixation on race to appear. I thought I was going to listen to a sad, maybe interesting story about how she lost her faith because she learned about the mormon lies as a missionary. Instead, John spent most of the episode fixated on the fact that she is black. John, I know this might be hard for you to understand. It is possible to disagree with Pres Obama’s politics without being a racist. I’m beginning to wonder, John, did Mormonism permanently program race fixation into your DNA or does obsession just come naturally for you?
Perhaps you can provide some time stamps to mark where John said things like this? I’m very confused.